Because I can’t stop laughing about LOL butter:
I’m tired because all I’ve done all day is drive around (three times to my mom’s house, three times to my house, twice to Toys ‘r Us, and let us not forget the trip to K-Mart, the grocery store and the post office!). I also dealt with a whiny toddler (whinier than usual, ergh), whiny father (I wish I was kidding), and whiny brothers. I have patience for a lot of things, but whining is not one of those things. To me, whining is the equivalent to nails raking down a chalkboard.
After an hour at Toys ‘r Us, warranty ring up issues and waiting for Dan to come with my car, Alyssa now has a swing set! FYI, a seven foot long box will fit in a hatchback. It’s just a matter of putting down the back seat, and reclining the front seat all the way back, and crushing the seven foot box up on top of the seat and right on into the dashboard. I had to drive home with no view of my rear view mirror, and the ability to see out of my passenger side mirror if I leaned forward to see around the box, and I was a bit scrunched, but it worked!
On a related note (trust me, the Toys ‘r Us/swing set relates to this), a lot of the time I hesitate in talking about any problems between Dan and myself, whether those problems be big or small. Something as insignificant as a squabble or something stupid he said or did is almost always blown way out of proportion by various visitors to my blog, to the point where it’s considered almost divorce-worthy, and I’m just a terrible, awful person to be with such a person and subject my children to such a person. But really, that is ridiculous. And STUPID. That’s like saying that the time I made Dan sleep on the couch is definitely abusive behavior, and CPS should be called in, pronto, because Alyssa and Ryan are totally being abused. Trust me, besides the fact that no such thing is happening, CPS doesn’t need to be called in, because they’re already there. I have my twelve year old brother to thank for that. He likes to fabricate things and exaggerate things, and is very good at twisting his words and make things sound like they’re not. Off the top of my head, these things include:
- him telling a therapist that I showered with him (What Actually Happened: I bathed him, as in him being in a tub and me sitting fully clothed outside of it, during his toddler years)
- him telling a teacher that Dan and I had sex in front of him (What Actually Happened: Dan and I were giggling and wrestling around in our bedroom, behind a closed and locked door, during one of the times my brother spent the night)
- him telling a teacher that I caused the scratch on his face (What Actually Happened: we were goofing around on the sofa, and when I went to swat at him, he jumped away, and rubbed his face along the side of a cushion, where a piece of plastic tubing was sticking out. When I asked him why he said such a thing, he said, and I quote, “Well, it felt like somebody scratched me” )
Anyway, I’m digressing. Just… think realistically, people. Married couples argue. They squabble. We’re HUMAN. It HAPPENS. We say stupid things and do stupid things. It just so happens that Dan says and does stupid things more than I do… Kidding. Okay, not really. Anyway, he has this irksome and annoying habit of getting really worked up over trivial shit. Like today, at Toys ‘r Us. I was there with my mom and Alyssa, and we had come in the Hyundai. Obviously, there was no way a seven foot long box was going to fit into a sedan. So, I called Dan and asked him to please come in my car, so we could take the swing set home. He agreed, and said he would leave right away, and would be at the store in about a half an hour.
Meanwhile, my mom asked if we could make a quick trip to the bank (about a half of a mile away), so she could get out some extra cash. I suggested she go herself, so that Alyssa and I would be at the store in case Dan arrived earlier. She said okay, took the Hyundai and left. Before she got back, Dan arrived. I was coming to the front of the store (bathroom break) when I saw him park. He got out of the car, and I could see him looking disgruntled as he looked around the parking lot and didn’t see our car. I came out and waved to Dan, and he came stomping over, wanting to know where the car was. I told him my mom had it while she went to the bank, and he huffed and snarled out, “Oh, so she is with you?” Then he huffed and bitched some more when he found out that my mom was buying a swing set as well. Why? I don’t know. I still don’t know. I don’t even think he knows.
Anyway, the grumbling and bitching and general shitty attitude and comments continued until, to my horror, I felt my voice breaking and my eyes tearing up when I asked him to please stop it, and to please leave (at this point the swing set had been loaded into the car). Right then my mom got back. As soon as she got out of the car and took a look at my face and our stances she knew something was wrong, and asked me what was wrong. To my horror, right there in front of the store, in front of other people, and in front of Dan, I burst into tears, and told her that Dan was treating me like total crap, but no reason at all. He didn’t say anything. She asked if there was anything she could do, and Dan snarled out an abrupt goodbye and left.
I don’t know what gets into him. I really don’t. He doesn’t know either, because I’ve asked him, and the response has always ultimately been, “I don’t know”. He has done this to me a few times before, so you would think I would be a little more used to it and be able to control my feelings and reactions a little better. But it’s hard… my reaction to any kind of strong emotion is to cry. Really upset? I cry. Really stressed? I cry. Really angry? I cry. I hate it, I really do. I feel so stupid and weak and vulnerable when I cry. But hating crying and hating the feelings I have when crying doesn’t stop me from crying. Really, I almost had a lid on things at the store, but the child in me burst into tears at the sight of her mother, the one person who can truly fix everything.
Sigh… other than stupid little squabbles like that, life is going well. Busy working, potty training, chasing after Ryan, enjoying motherhood, hating the chores that come along with being a housewife, and plodding along with the weight loss. I hit 290 today, yay! Eleven pounds lost in about three weeks. My goal of 275 lbs. by October 27th is looming ever closer!
Congrats on the weight loss. Do it in small amounts and eventually you’ll reach your goal weight. I agree with the whining comments, I can’t deal with it either. It’s so irritating. As for Daniel…. sometimes men are agh and you can’t explain why but it happens.
Don’t feel bad about the crying deal, it happens to me as well no matter what the emotion but as long as it’s strong I’ll end up crying. :-\
Heh I already commented on Lavish about the butter.. but it still makes me laugh.
I can completely understand the crying thing. I am a CRY BABY.. you know when people say “If you look under -insert word here- in the dictionary, your picture would be next to it!” .. yeah.. that’s me.. for Crybaby. I’m exactly the same, too. No matter what the emotion, when it gets really intense, I cry.. and Jeremiah doesn’t know how to handle it. His response is usually him being more rude/upset with me.. but he doesn’t realize that the reason I end up crying is because I’m frustrated that he won’t let up.
UGH.. anyways.
It’s like the male form of PMS.
I also cry when overwhelmed, that’s really what it is, you get SO overwhelmed by emotions, by the situation, and you don’t really have an outlet except to cry to get those happy hormones kicked into gear.
HA! Potty training… man that brings me back… good times… I learned the hard way that my child will happily use an entire roll of toilet paper if I don’t stop him right off the bat.
That LOL butter has got to be the most awesome thing I’ve seen in months!
The way you say that Dan said “oh she is with you?” almost makes me think that perhaps he has a problem with your mom? Are there any issues there that could possibly be the reason he acted the way he did, or did he already seem upset prior to knowing you were with your mom?
Either way, I wouldn’t feel bad about showing your emotions; if he was arguing w/ you and making you upset for no damn reason then I too would get upset & start crying…then again like others have said, I’m a cry baby
Only thing else to do, is to keep talking with each other and seeing if you can come up w/ a solution or a reason as to why he acts the way he does sometimes, perhaps there is a reason there he just doesn’t know how to tell you.
-raises hand- I’m part of the crying club too
Arguments, anger whatever = me crying.
Here’s the kicker – every month or so I’ll wake up bawling. No reason. No nightmare or nothing – just wake up and bawl. Although usually i’m dreaming about something to do with my parents or something. Go figure.
I think every married couple have little stiffs with each other. It’s only normal.
Every once in a while I can’t keep things under control and I start crying and unleash at my husband. It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does it grabs my husbands attention. For me, it feels like I can only handle so much of someone’s pissy mood or someone who continually pushes my buttons before I explode.
I have the same problem with crying. Whether I’m sad, just upset, angry, or stressed I burst into tears. It sucks. Because then when I’m angry about something people think I’m just throwing a tantrum or being a crybaby about it, when really I’m just pissed off. Urgh. :mad:
I cannot get angry, frustrated, stressed, mad, happy, with out crying. I just end up caving in arguments to go and cry. It’s terrible, and really bad. Most of the time we just go back when I’m calm and we try talking and explain our actions/words/feelings from earlier. That helps to solve our disagreements.
Have you tried talking with Dan about how he makes you feel, and perhaps try and get an explanation out of him as to why his attitude was so negative.
LOL @ the LOL Butter!
By the way, Preston gets like that too sometimes. I think it’s just a guy PMS thing as well.
I know exactly how you feel. When i get into situations like that I tear up and of course the site of my “MOMMY” I cry it just happens no matter how hard I try it just seems to happen. Maybe you can sit down and explain to him how you feel when he does things like that.
Its so good to know that I’m not the only one who cries like that over strong emotions. And then I get angry because he made me feel like crap, and when I’m angry he’s angry, but he’s only angry because I’m angry and not because of anything else.
By the way – your marrage is going to fail miserably. Just kidding.
James has a Kia Spectra hatchback…and it’s crazy how much we can cram into that thing…It helped us move from our apt to our house, and it holds almost as much as a pickup!
I have the crying when angry/stressed thing too….and I hate it as well! Makes me feel so weak…