We ran out of propane yesterday morning. This was discovered yesterday morning, when I woke up and immediately remarked that it was “fucking freezing!” We cranked the thermostat up to 90. Nothing. We checked the pilot light – out. After six failed attempts at relighting, Dan went and checked our propane tanks. 100% EMPTY. We went through 100 gallons of propane in exactly eight weeks. And that’s with keeping the thermostat set to 70 degrees, and turning it down whenever we went out.
In addition to heating, propane fuels our stove. So guess who has no heat and no stove or oven until next Friday morning?
This bites. It really, really bites. Our heating bill is $529. We need to pay that before we can have more propane delivered. We were going to pay it in January, but then we had the whole mess with the car go down at the end of December. That $1200 ($800 to our car lender and $400 for storage fees) we shelled out to get our car back? Yeah, originally almost half of that would have covered our heating bill, and the other half would have covered the usual car payment, and probably our electric bill or Comcast bill.
We have about $30 to our name until next Friday, which is when our tax return (in the $3000 range) and Dan’s paycheck will hit our bank account. I knew we were low on propane, and had been conserving as much as possible (namely, turning down to heat to 68 degrees), but it just wasn’t enough to see us through one more week. Now we need to see ourselves through one more week. Probably a little more, because I can pay the bill next Friday and order more propane, but I have a feeling it won’t be delivered until the following Monday. Ugh. Of all months for this to happen, why FEBRUARY?
It was really, REALLY cold here last night. My mom was out, and she picked up a space heater for us. It’s pretty decent once it gets up and running, but it’s only enough to heat the living room and a bit of the kitchen. I don’t want it in any of the bedrooms, because having a space heater on a carpeted floor makes me nervous. And with three cats running around, there’s no way in hell I’m letting it run overnight. So we shut it off last night when we went to bed. I had the kids dressed in layers and thick socks all day yesterday, and last night they were in two layers of pajamas and then sleepers on top of it, and then in bed with us, under several covers and our thick, down comforter. Thankfully, both Alyssa and Ryan are like little space heaters themselves, so they were warm and toasty, and kept ME warm and toasty (Dan was on the other side of them, so I’m not sure how he fared).
My mom can’t really help, because she has her own bills to take care of. But if it gets really brutal here, I can always pack up the kids and send them to her. I’ll stay here to keep the space heater going at all times (except for when I’m sleeping), because there’s no place in my mom’s house for our three cats.
I got in touch with my dad this morning, finally, after trying to get a hold of him all week, and trying several times yesterday. I asked to borrow the $529 from him, and I’ll be able to give it back, in full and in cash, next Friday. I could mail a check, a money order, or simply take him the cash. His choice. He said he would have to check with Charles, who is the director of the house he lives in, to make sure there is enough in his bank account. He said he isn’t sure, but honestly I don’t see how that’s possible, as he receives $800 per month in disability, and hasn’t had any expenses except for his rent/food bill (it’s a combined $375 and is turned over to the house director at the beginning of each month) since October. Even with minor purchases and such, he should have well over $2500 in his account.
I really, REALLY hope he can come through, because if not, we’re fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. There is no one else to ask. Dan, as usual, considers anything like this to be MY problem, and so he refuses to ask his rich, rolling in the dough aunt for a loan to pay our heating bill until next Friday. Once again, everything gets dumped on me. Sometimes I get so tired of being the one to scramble and cover and fix everything. I really do. 
I feel so low right now. What kind of mother lets her kids get cold in the dead of winter?!
