Currently, I am my mother’s scapegoat. She is in complete denial when it comes to her behavior and treatment of my brothers, especially my fifteen year old brother. To hear my mother tell it, I contacted CPS (FYI, CPS contacted me when they couldn’t get in touch with or find her; Dan and I spilled the beans to them on everything that was going on when they called) just to cause trouble. I’m “brainwashing” my fifteen year old brother and pitting him against her. Really? I’m not filling his head with stories. He’s been the recipient of the majority of what she’s said and done, or he’s been here to witness it. The CPS caseworker herself witnessed some of it when she first went to the motel to pick up my brother and bring him here — right in front of him my mom called him and I a multitude of names, wished us both dead, etc. But to hear my mom tell it, it’s all me. Me me me. The big bad horrible Jenn.
As if any perfectly sane adult child would plot with CPS to cause her mother and teenage siblings drama and upset, just for the hell of it.
In any case, the court hearing to confirm the removal of my fifteen year old brother from my mother’s physical and legal custody took place on Friday. Dan and I got there first, and then my mom arrived, with my thirteen year old brother in tow. My brother was happy to see us, though initially a little reluctant to come over to us — I’m sure that’s because of god only knows what kind of stories my mother has been filling his head with. (My thirteen year old brother is much more susceptible to my mom’s influence, and then makes me sad.) At first my mom completely ignored us. Then she came over ranting about how her false filing with the police went nowhere, and that she was getting in touch with the officer again, blah blah blah. Then she went back to her seat. Then, about twenty minutes later, she did the switch thing she often does, and came over to chat to me about where she’s staying, what she does, the programs offered for my brother, etc. — as if nothing was wrong and we were on the best of terms. (Again, what the fuck?)
Then my fifteen year old brother and his CPS caseworker arrived. He was very happy to see us and came right over to us, though I did encourage him to go say hello to my mom and other brother. (As furious as I am with my mother, I refuse to say or do anything to put either of my brothers in a position where they feel they need to “choose” between us. Unlike my mother, I am not making a personal battle out of this.)
The court hearing itself went well. Dan and I waited outside, but the CPS caseworker told us that my mom didn’t fight the charges or recommendations, which is the removal of my brother from her physical and legal custody, and his physical custody transferred to Dan and I, and obviously my brother’s placement with us.
But before that happens, we have to be approved for kinship care, which I am inexplicably nervous about. The caseworker who handles that is coming out tomorrow morning at 9:30am. Both she and my brother’s caseworker assured me that everything will go fine, especially since she (my brother’s caseworker) has been here before, and my brother has lived with us before (most recently for three days between when the caseworker removed him from my mother’s care and the initial placement court hearing).
In preparation for tomorrow morning’s inspection and my brother (hopefully!!!) living with us, Dan and I went out yesterday and purchased a bunk bed for Ryan’s room. Initially we were going to switch the bedrooms so that Alyssa took Ryan’s smaller room and Ryan and my brother shared Alyssa’s larger one, but even with doing that it would be a very tight squeeze to have two twin beds in the larger of the two kids’ bedrooms. So, we decided to put a bunk bed in Ryan’s bedroom. This one is pretty cool — it’s a metal frame that accommodates a standard twin mattress on the top bunk, and features a futon on the bottom bunk. If left in the “sofa” position, the futon is about the size of a twin. When laid flat, it opens up into a full (note to self: buy a set of full sheets today!). The ladder is built in to the side of the bunk, so there’s no protruding ladder to worry about. Here’s the bunk/futon on Amazon — we picked out the white frame. Oh, and we paid just over $300 for it, even with tax. Yay for overstocked warehouses. 
Today Dan and I are taking Alyssa and Ryan to the Renaissance Faire, and when we come back this evening our first course of action is to get the kids bathed and into bed. The second? Last minute straightening up and cleaning, and then the tackling of the thick stack of paperwork we need to read through and fill out in preparation for tomorrow morning. I don’t know why, but I am really, really nervous about getting the approval. 
We meet the “basics”, so I guess my nervousness is a little bit of an overreaction. We have a separate bed for him (since it’s kinship care and not foster care, it’s acceptable for him to share a bedroom with Ryan), and we have all of the housing “basics”: electricity, running water, operable kitchen appliances, stocked refrigerator, fire extinguisher (though I want to get another one today, since this one is several years old), functioning smoke detectors throughout the house (every room except for the bathrooms, as a matter of fact), etc.
Oh — I think I mentioned on Twitter, but I’ll also mention it here: I found a home for Molly. I won’t go into details about where, in case my mom reads this (I don’t want her harassing the new owners), but let it suffice to say that they are very nice people, a married couple in their early 60s, retired, just one other dog (a large, senior age retriever), majorly excited about having a small dog to tote around and spoil, etc. While I miss Molly a teensy bit (what can I say? She was sweet and cuddly), I’m very glad to have her out of my house, and I’m happier still to know that she is in a good home where she will be loved and doted upon and taken care of properly. I don’t think Leah really misses her. If anything, she enjoys not having to share my attentions!
Good luck, Jenn! I am sure you and Dan will do fine and pass with flying colors; if anything, the paperwork should be the only headache (at least, it is here in Kansas for the same kinship process). It’s great that the judge has allowed you all to be placement. Curious though, why hasn’t your younger brother been removed from your mothers care? Maybe I missed that part.
Your mom obviously has issues. I’m glad that court went well for you guys though and hopefully the transition goes well. So Amr gets to stay in her care then?
Good luck, but I’m sure you’ll do fine. =D
I think they kinda have to place kids with kin first so they have to give you chances even if you are lacking in something. You aren’t lacking in anything, you need a bed and a place for him to put clothes in. Literally, if you have a hole in your floor they will tell you to put something over it for safety of the child. I should not know that, but I was too nervous and my social worker shared a lot about houses that were in bad condition with me and how they told them to do this an that like sit something heavy on the hole to cover it.
I think you are fine, but it’s totally normal to be nervous!